"The only thing that stays the same is that everything changes."
Change seems to be the theme of my life at the moment. Last week, my boyfriend and I, after two years together, went our separate ways. To say I never thought I'd be in this position is an understatement. From the time we started dating, I knew I had found a rare jewel. He was (and is) a truly good man with a good heart. There was never a doubt in my mind that he was it for me. But just because two people are good as individuals does not always mean that they are good for each other. I guess we're still friends. We never agreed to a friendship, but we have corresponded a couple of times since the break-up, and although we are obviously both still hurting, there's no reason to hate each other and never speak again. I miss him. Terribly. I miss his laugh. I miss how he understood me without needing an explanation. I miss having someone to call each night and tell your whole day to. But these are things that I will get used to. Several people have asked me if I am okay. Frankly, right now I am not, but I will be. Sometimes you have to just let things hurt for a while. Nothing heals the pain except time. Two years is a long time to date someone, and some days it's still a shock when I wake up and remember that we're no longer together. Adjusting and healing will just take some time, but I'll get there. I am trying to use this time as a single woman to concentrate on myself. Again, this is another adjustment. I am used to putting my time and energy into taking care of others. Finding a balance between taking care of myself and taking care of those I love is a learning process. But I certainly do have the time to learn right now. So right now I'm living a "one day at a time" kind of life. But it's times that these that builds character and makes you a better person. I know that God is preparing my heart for something great, and I intend to be ready and with an open heart when the time comes along. Right now, I just need a little time to put the pieces back together.
